Thursday, June 28, 2007

Stitches Anyone?

Ahhhh...the joys of parenting.

I love that my son and his friends want to hang out at O/our home. I always know who he's with, what he's doing, and where he is when they're here. I like that he goes to their houses or out with them too, but having them here rocks.

Partly because I really enjoy teenagers in the first place. I make sure there's food and drinks, and a degree of privacy, and a deaf ear to teenage language. I enjoy talking with them about all kinds of things, from the video games they're playing to current events.

So it's common for friends to stay all night, sometimes they sleep, sometimes they pull all night grinds on the favorite game. Last night there were 2 friends over. 2 friends I know well and trust.

That's why, when the knock came on my bedroom door at 4:24 AM and one of his friends tells me that my son has to go to the emergency room, he needs stitches, I didn't think twice. These are smart kids, and if they think something is that serious then it is.

I checked the wound myself, hugged my son tight, and told him it would be OK - he was trying so hard not to cry, and he was so scared. Pretty hard for an almost 16 year old tough guy to be strong, but he did great! Then I threw on some clothes and we piled in the car for a trip to the emergency room.

One of the boys thought he had to go home. Oh HELL no! lol If I have to sit in an emergency room at 4:30 AM, so did he!!

5 stitches in his lip later, one panic attack while getting the needle of novacaine in the gums, and we're on our way back home. He's fine, sleeping soundly, and all will be well.

This was his first set of stitches, so he's been very lucky so far! Although I didn't get my first set till I was 30, and it was 6 stitches - so I still have 1 up on him! (I really hope he never catches up to me.)

I need a nap.


Monday, June 25, 2007


I finally watched "The Secretary". Relaxing on our bed, watching together the 52" HD TV, enjoying the DVD, I'm still surprised I had never seen this movie before.

I had many emotions as the movie progressed, and some strong emotional responses. This was surprising to me, and of course I had to ponder everything since it goes against my nature to accept things as is. I have to understand the situation, as well as how it applies to me, or affects me, or how I respond to it. (Surely you aren't surprised! You know it's all about me!)

Much of what I felt was typical I think, at least in the beginning of the movie. As the story progressed I felt more submissive, and found myself irritated with Mr. Grey. This irritation progressed to something more severe, and I found myself relating his behavior to the behavior of Doms I've known in the past. (Yes, I told you, it's all about me!) And yet, by the end of the movie I came to understand that Mr. Grey was not full-grown in his Dominance, and indeed the movie was as much about his coming of age as it was about Lee discovering her nature and growing into it.

Interesting how fiction allows us to reflect on our own lives. I wonder in what ways my life would be different had I seen this movie a couple years ago? A rather sobering thought that a work of fiction can somehow affect the course of our lives. Perception, experience, belief, and feelings all play a part in decisions we make. Since I prefer a story to have a happy ending, I'm glad that Lee came to her senses and then gave Edward the chance to come to his as well!


Friday, June 22, 2007

Choose Your Master

"Instead of waiting for someone to take you under their wing, go out there and find a good wing to climb under."

-- Dave Thomas

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

From Atari to X-Box 360 And Beyond

I have recently experienced a new phenomenon. That is, the perception on the part of many people that playing video games is juvenile, and something we are expected to grow out of as we age and mature.

Honestly, as a child of the era in which video games became common-place, I have always played and enjoyed the games. Some of my favorite memories of my son's younger years involve playing video games with him. I still have my Atari - although I don't play it, I could because it still works.

But last week I was watching a program on TV in which the host of the show was giving the home-owner a hard time because he played video games, and kept his game console and games in a prominent place in the home. The host remarked about the need to grow up and leave our childhood behind. That really puzzled me as I'm quite mature and responsible, I work in the same career I began 14 years ago, I own my own home, as a single parent I care for and provide for my son, I care for my elderly mother, I survived and persevered through a nasty 20 year marriage and nastier divorce (that seemed to last just as long!)

So my point with that, is that I am an adult, a productive member of society, and my enjoyment of video games does not make me less an adult nor less productive.

That comment was enough to get me started on that train of thought, and then another comment was made a few days later by someone else. Upon hearing that Master was playing video games with my teenage son (some would call that bonding, btw) my Mom commented that oh no, he hasn't grown up yet??!! (The implication that she hadn't seen that side of him before and was sorry to hear about it, and here I've chosen another immature partner.) And here I thought I was sharing something really positive, the enjoyment the 2 of them got from the games, the belly-laughs coming from the family room as they played, the comaraderie between them, and more besides. And yet, Mom saw it in a different light.

So between those 2 comments, I've been pondering a great deal on this phenomenon, and the way our culture/society perceives video games. I find myself feeling sorry for people who've never allowed themselves to relax and have fun, and for close-mindedness that allows them to make judgements about other people without acknowledging that there could be a different and yet equally valid point of view.